The Suitcase Lady


August 4, 2009, 10:41 pm

Dinner at our house has always been the time to come together and share the events of the day. The other night my husband said with a grin, “I saw something really weird today.” Then he added, “You better finish the food in your mouth before I tell you about it.” I dutifully chewed and swallowed.

My guy had been to Fleet Farm’s huge sporting goods department checking on canoe prices. “You will never guess what they had in with the hunting and fishing gear… sexy women’s underwear. And not just a few, but racks and racks of fancy camouflage lingerie.” He painted a picture of a veritable Frederick’s of Fleet Farm.

I started to laugh, pondering the purpose of scanty, camo undies. Is a girl supposed to put down her rifle and strip in the middle of the woods to attract a buck? After all, those guy deer are all in rut in November. Might save money on corn and apples. Or is the lingerie show her guy’s reward for bringing home the buck? On the other hand, maybe female hunters just don’t want to go into the woods unaccessorized.

At any rate, my curiosity was aroused, and I decided to check out the merchandise. Sure enough, a sizable amount of floor space between gun safes and footballs was given over to female underwear. And I’m fairly certain these garments weren’t designed to keep a girl warm in the woods.

Skimpy baby dolls, bras, camisoles and bikinis were all available in two basic patterns, leaf and deer camo or blaze orange camo. Trim was black lace or hot pink piping. The hang tags read: “Wilderness Dreams – It’s not a passion, it’s an obsession.” I am not sure what the “it” refers to. I do know that somebody could make a fortune reselling this stuff in trendy, New York boutiques.

3 Comments for this entry


    Maybe, Mary, we should have done that a long time ago, but in our long johns! hahaha Then they would have brought home the buck instead of
    saying, “did you see the one that got away ?” So next time we’ll have to bring lingerie to catch the big one… hahaha

  • Roxane

    You have never been to Cabela’s have you?

  • Mary

    You are right, I have not been to Cabela’s. I figure that if I cannot get an item at Piggly Wiggly, a thrift store or Fleet Farm, I probably don’t need it.